Validation: Why Do We Seek It, and How Can We Stop?

Hey there, bestie! Let’s have a little heart-to-heart about something we all deal with—validation. You know what I’m talking about… that urge to check who viewed your story, the need to ask five different people if your outfit is cute, or that little worry about what so-and-so thinks of your new project. Sound familiar?

Seeking validation is totally natural; we all want a little nod of approval now and then. But here’s the catch—when we rely too much on others’ opinions, it can start to mess with our heads. We start to base our choices on what we think others want, rather than what actually feels right for us. And that’s no fun!

Why We Crave Validation

Let’s get real: validation can make us feel good. It’s that little ego boost that makes us feel seen and appreciated. But here’s the thing—it can quickly become a habit, where our self-worth starts to depend on the thumbs-up from others. Over time, this can make us doubt ourselves, avoid taking risks, and even hold back from being fully us.

Signs You’re Stuck in the Validation Loop

If you catch yourself hesitating to post something or holding back on a decision because you’re worried about what people might say, that’s validation-seeking. Maybe you fear judgment or find yourself feeling a bit disconnected, like you’re not quite living for you. And here’s the kicker—constantly looking for approval actually pulls us away from our own instincts and desires.

How to Ditch the Validation Trap

1. Listen to Yourself First – Next time you’re tempted to get everyone’s opinion, pause and ask, “What do I really think?” Trust that inner voice!

2. Embrace Being Wrong – It’s okay to make mistakes. Life’s about learning, not about being right all the time. So, even if others don’t agree, stand by your choices. They’re part of your growth.

3. Build Your Own Confidence – Spend time on self-love. When you’re more secure in yourself, that need for external validation starts to fade. You’ll start to validate yourself, which is way more empowering.

4. Value Your Expertise – You know yourself better than anyone! Start giving more weight to your own opinions and instincts, and remind yourself that your perspective matters.

Post for Yourself, Not for Others

Let’s face it: social media can make the validation game even harder. We worry about likes, comments, and who’s watching. But remember, you’re the one in control here. Post that picture, share that story, wear that outfit—for you. Not for the imaginary audience in your head. Who cares if your story only has a few views? You loved it, and that’s what counts.

Final Pep Talk

You are amazing just as you are—quirks, opinions, and all. Don’t let anyone else’s approval (or lack of it) define your worth. You’re more than enough, exactly as you are. So go out there, make decisions for you, and leave the rest behind. And hey, if you need a reminder, just come back here. I’ll be cheering you on!